But this pleasant dream remains a fantasy, for summertime is when the Crazed Wax Custodians (official motto: Wax We Must) emerge from their lairs to rampage and terrorize. They spend the entire school year with one arm propped on a reception counter, holding a cup of coffee (see, they can too multi-task) and the other hand propped on a hip. So nine months of pent-up energy erupt irresistibly during the summer break.

Nothing stands in their way: not furniture, not computers, not even an arm-linked line of determined IT guys trying to stake out a tiny bit of turf to call their own. Seized by the irresistible wax compulsion they sweep into classrooms, pile all the computers and furniture in the hall, then wax and buff the floors to a high gloss. Including the power and data ports in the floors. Then, being considerate fellows, they put the chairs and computers back in an aesthetically-pleasing random order.

When it's all finished everyone is happy and admiring. "Oo shiny!" Then students and teachers return to class, and the custodians return to their normal state of semi-hibernation.

It's all true. I am not making this up. Except for the happy ending.